Make SQLite durable under concurrent readers and stop re-delivering stranded webhooks (closes #256)

An operator running `sqlite3 <db> .dump` against their own per-webhook
database wedged it: inbound webhooks rejected with HTTP 500, delivered
webhooks stranded at `pending`, and every one of them POSTed a second
time on the next restart while the event log recorded a single attempt.

Durability. Every SQLite file — main, per-webhook, and archive — now
opens through one path, `internal/database/sqlite_open.go`, in WAL
journal mode with a 10-second busy timeout, `BEGIN IMMEDIATE`
transactions, and a bounded connection pool. WAL is what stops a reader
blocking writers at all. `_txlock=immediate` is what stops a `COMMIT`
failing while its transaction stays open on a pooled connection, which
is how four `database is locked` errors became 593 `cannot start a
transaction within a transaction`. `cache=shared` is gone, because
under it an in-process conflict is SQLITE_LOCKED, which the busy
handler does not retry. The busy timeout is applied before
journal_mode: the driver runs DSN pragmas in order on every new
connection, and `PRAGMA journal_mode` takes a lock, so the reverse
order leaves the one pragma that can block uncovered by the handler
meant to cover it.

Eligibility. `internal/delivery/inflight.go` holds the set of
deliveries the engine owns — taken when a task is queued, when a
target schedules a retry, and by every recovery path before it
re-dispatches; dropped when the worker that ran the task returns.
Recovery and both sweep arms re-dispatch only what the set does not
hold. Nothing decides that from a row's age: a delivery waiting in a
10000-deep channel is arbitrarily old and perfectly healthy, and
reasoning from age re-sends it. `takeForRedispatch` is the single gate
every re-dispatch goes through — ownership first, then a conditional
update confirming the row is still in the status the batch read.

Bookkeeping. `recordResult` and `updateDeliveryStatus` return their
errors instead of logging and dropping them, and a caller whose
bookkeeping write failed writes nothing at all: the delivery keeps
whichever non-terminal status it already held, and the sweeps recover
it. Every recovery path — pending and retrying alike — first settles
any delivery that already holds a successful `DeliveryResult` rather
than sending it again. Recovery continues each delivery's own attempt
numbering instead of restarting at 1. The sweep gains a
`pending`-with-age-bound arm, so a stranded delivery no longer waits
for a restart.

Docs. WAL produces `-wal`/`-shm` sidecars, so the backup and restore
procedures in README.md are corrected against measurement: both
documented procedures were re-run against a live instance, a `-wal`
left by a crash carries data the `.db` alone does not, and an archive
file normally holds its rows in a `-wal` rather than in the `.db`.

internal/handlers/event_resubmit.go

@@ -143,10 +143,10 @@ func (h *Handlers) resubmitEvent(
 	}
 
 	// Read before the write transaction is opened. The body can be up
-	// to the 1 MB ingest cap, and holding a read of it inside the
-	// transaction would extend how long the per-webhook database is
-	// locked against the receiver, which runs these files in
-	// SQLite's default journal mode rather than WAL.
+	// to the 1 MB ingest cap, and every transaction on these files
+	// takes the write lock at BEGIN (_txlock=immediate, see
+	// internal/database/sqlite_open.go), so reading inside it would
+	// hold that lock against the receiver for the length of the read.
 	src, found, err := loadResubmitSource(
 		webhookDB, webhook.ID, eventID.String(),
 	)